Thursday, August 11, 2011

Blogiversary II (And the story of my URL)

Four score and two years ago (minus the four score) a 21-year-old man started a blog.

His name was me.

I mean, that was me. I did that. I was the 21-year-old and I started a blog two years ago today. This one. Called Popcorn Day. It’s my second blogiversary today. Are you following now?

It seems like only yesterday I was home fresh from a trip to Europe during which I discovered I had a panic disorder (I’ve found that many of the most successful bloggers suffer from similar ailments) but also discovered I love blogging and couldn’t for the life of me stop, so I started Popcorn Day based on a dream I had once.

As I began to set up the blog, I entered to check its availability. After a suspenseful moment or two spent watching as the words “Checking Availability” added and subtracted periods from their ellipsis, like the colorful pinwheel that Apple uses to say "I'm thinking, dammit," I was saddened to see that the URL wasn’t available. “Who could possibly have a blog with that title?” I wondered angrily. So I typed in the URL that SHOULD BE MINE, pressed enter, and discovered one of the strangest and mysterious blogs I’ve ever seen.

The blog, entitled “Super Queen Gum 2 Your Rescue,” consists of 19 posts, each written either on November 28th, 2009, or February 6th, 2010.  Every post has one picture, accompanied by a colorful sentence all in caps lock, mostly relating to either this woman’s birthday or Christmas presents.

THIS is why I couldn’t have

I was pissed.

To this day, the woman who refers to herself as Super Queen Gum (yet her name on her profile page is PopCornDay) is an enigma. Is her name actually PopCornDay?  Or is it Super Queen Gum, which is just as implausible? Who IS Oldman and why does he go gaga to get Godiva Teddies for her? And where did he get all his money? 

I’ve commented on one of her posts to try to get some more information about her, but received no response. Here is my final plea:

Dear Super Queen Gum (2 my rescue),

We share something that I believe is very special: Popcorn Day. When I first discovered our unique bond, I resented you because I wanted your URL. It’s been two years now and not only have I forgiven you but I’ve grown to love your unchanging, brief blog, like an online Pompeii, images frozen just like they were on November 28th, 2009 and February 6th, 2010. It’s beautiful, really.
What I’d like to ask of you is that you contact me, in all your colorful, all-caps glory if you so desire. Explain to me the mystery of what Popcorn Day means to you, so I no longer have to wonder. This is all I ask, Super Queen Gum.

Best regards,

Brian Schroeder, your friend from Popcorn Day

And so, I reluctantly settled with Someday I’ll write to the douchemeister who owns and uses it only as a referral to his other site. SOME PEOPLE WANT THAT URL, MAN.

Anyway, happy blogiversary, everyone! Cheers!

Goals for this year:
1. Don’t you DARE miss National Popcorn Day, January 19th again.


  1. I feel like we should make a cake to celebrate. And popcorn. A popcorn cake. A GIANT HALLOWEEN-Y POPCORN BALL

  2. NOW YER TALKIN!!! I was planning on making some sort of popcorn related thing, but ran out of time. *sigh* next year.

  3. Yeah...who the hell is oldman? Her dad? Her husband? Her sugar daddy? And why would he go gaga over a silly teddy bear in a bag? But then again she seems to enjoy weird stuffed animals because she has them propped all over her sofa. She does like dropping her brand names too.

    This is almost as fun as people-watching at an airport!

    Love the emotion in your face!

  4. It's a mystery. I like to think Oldman is a sugar daddy, but what confuses me more is: Is SQG (Super Queen Gum) referring to him as "my old man" or is Oldman his last name? This is something I need to know.

  5. Brian! Why didn't you tell JennaRose that your nextdoor neighbor made you a popcorn cake for your college graduation?? It was awesome. And rootbeer flavored.

    I always thought she called her sugardaddy OLDMAN because he was an old man. I don't think English is her first language. Is that harsh? It seemed funny.

    (p.s. you checked the availability of the url not the ability.)


  6. I should have talked about that cake. YOM.

    I'm pretty sure English isn't her first language either. There are just so many things that are a mystery about her besides that. SHE'S AN ENIGMA.